Satan is on the prowl.
Always lurking on his prey, seeking your weaknesses, making those his strong holds. And it works too, it works until it comes to light.
Because fear is a distraction from what we could be doing. It’s something else to preoccupy our time and fill our minds with, instead of the work set before us. He tries SO HARD to put things in our path to force us to dodge and twist and manipulate and excuse our lives before facing kingdom work.
The fear of flying, the excuses, the longing for comfort, and empty tummy, dirty clothes, mango larvae, bed bugs, allergic reactions to medicine, nightfall in foreign territory. It is ALL my joy.
” ‘My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.’ So I will BOAST all the more gladly of my weaknesses so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why for HIS sake, I take delight in my weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Cor. 12:9-12
Your’s too. Your excuses, and wonderings, and fears, and disbeliefs. They are His already. Your arguing and thoughts. Your unbelief. It’s His strength.
I have a choice. I can choose to remove myself. I can choose to distance my heart from being here, and being His hands. I can choose to get by and stay to my selfish self. Or I can give it all and hold none of it back. I can choose to take these things as joy because life is only a brief moment, a breath. Fear on this earth is only valid if you are fearful of what is to come. And why should we fear that glorious day?
2 weeks and I love it more everyday. All my shoes are red now. The way I can play a guessing game as to where my next meal comes from. A first look at a Ugandan hospital ward. The singing and clapping of Saturday worship in Buziika and children’s squeals of gladness of how Jesus set them free. An older girl sharing her faith with a lost brother. The way people try to rip me off because of my skin color. The nightly game of bedbugs, wondering if the heat is probably just getting to my head. Giving clothes to a friend, and watching her child slowly come alive through sweet roommates who go out of their way to bring comfort. Long, long, long walks in the middle of nowhere, being led by a bunch of girls. Breathing in the air by the river, friends who share coffee. Not knowing where my phone is–ever. Poppyseed chicken, without the poppyseads. Getting sunburt. Baby toes and babies falling asleep on my back. A perfectly timed gust of wind. Laughter. Belly-hurting, eyes watering, can’t breathe, space filling, uncontrollable, resounding laughter.
All of it. The ugly and the beautiful is all His. Because in time he makes the ugly beautiful.
So I will boast in my weakness, I will tell the hard instead of keeping to myself, I will wear it on my sleeve and expose it for the world to see. Because it is not the weakness that is seen, but rather it is filtered through Him in order to magnify and glorify Him.
If you want to pray, pray for Gideon. That his little body would fight back Malaria and sickle cell, as well as a multitude of other complications. (More on him later, think Mason Jar!) Pray for baby Steven, that his small body would gain strength beyond expectations. Pray that my anxious fears and mistrust in the Lord who got me thus far would be dismissed, and also for my health. Pray for peace in this city, for Jesus to be known, when regulations and rules and questions of ethics are called up. That all may be seen through His eyes, as servants working as ONE, for ONE. Pray that “Satan would get behind.” Pray that Jesus is known in a deeper way. Not just His name, His story, but His heart.
“Be alert. Your enemy prowls like a hungry lion looking for something to devour.” 1 Peter 5:8
“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7
“I promise you what I promised Moses. Wherever you set foot, on land I have given you, no one will be able to stand against you as long as you live.” Joshua 1:3
“Who will harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed.” 1 Peter 3:13
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18
Don’t you want to be perfect in love? Start boasting about your weaknesses.